|
|
Post by Gene L.D. Ryoko on Sept 19, 2005 17:58:24 GMT -5
hurray for long titles
intro
Once there were 7 god yoshi's,these yoshi's lade the legendary neon eggs,these eggs are more special then the avarege yoshi egg. when they laid them this year however,there was a dark cloud,the eggs scattered to dark,dangerous places: jokes end,mimics tower,dark tower,sirens castle,dopples mansion,treepie village,malo space(dream),and rapter island. another part of the curse turned the eggs holders and the yoshi baby into monsters. So this is where our story starts,in the middle of a small town called triton village.
prologue
"what is happening over there", said Yoshiru,"It appers one of Yokazukas cats have run loose(>_<),nothing the Mario bros. can't handle". He started to go back to sleep when......."Thief get back here". "Yahh",Yoshiru said getting up". Yoshiru jumped off his little house. "So your the trouble maker around here",he shouted. "Oh yeah whats a yoshi kid gonna do" the thief replyed."This" *smack* the thief was smashed across the ground by yoshiru's hammer. The cops showed up later and took the guy to jail,but yoshiru saw something funny,two girlish looking monsters. "sirens", was Yoshiru's first thought.
to be continued
|
|
|
|
Post by Enrique on Sept 19, 2005 18:02:47 GMT -5
Looks quite interesting. Your prologue is suspenceful as well. I can't wait to see more!
|
|
|
|
Post by Lord of the Dance on Sept 20, 2005 9:12:08 GMT -5
I can't wait to see the next part. Very suspenceful ^^ I like it, great job!
|
|
|
|
Post by Gene L.D. Ryoko on Sept 20, 2005 15:56:55 GMT -5
As Yoshiru turned the corner into the ally way he saw the to women,and as he thought they were sirens. "hey you",yoshiru called. "we shall not be called hey you,we shall be called kora..." the other one finished "....and kira". "I'm yoshiru and what are you doing in this town"." they replied "ooo the boy wants to know..." ".....we are here on bowlettas orders to find these neon eggs,they special powers not ment for the weak minded" "wait bowletta was destroyed by mario and luigi",said yoshiru. "the king of the elements rainbow dragon brought her back",said kora. "She is a little bony now but she is back to power",followed kira. "tell bowletta this" WHAM in a matter of 3.4 seconds kora was slammed into the wall. "why you little....." in an instant what was two girls was now to half bird-half human mosters. "kora,kira. we have found the first neon egg get out of there and head to jokes end imidietly" said a mysterious voice. the two sirens left. "jokes end ehh",said yoshiru. " i wonder what would happen if I beat them to it" yoshiru ran tword the bridge to the fields and started his adventure in the yoshi kingdom
next chapter
chapter 1: a neon egg on Ice
|
|
|
|
Post by Enrique on Sept 20, 2005 16:16:42 GMT -5
Quite humorous! I really like how you started this fanfic and the suspence that you employ. Great job! Keep it up!
|
|
|
|
Post by Lord of the Dance on Sept 20, 2005 22:08:43 GMT -5
Yeah! I like it, great job! Can't wait to see that Bowletta get a whoopin' XD
|
|
|
|
Post by Gene L.D. Ryoko on Sept 30, 2005 17:30:26 GMT -5
Chapter 1: A Neon Egg On Ice
yoshi kingdom fields
"So the first egg is at jokes end eh",yoshiru pondered. "Well I better hitch a ride because the west coast is far off". "Hey little boy",said a mysterious voice,"are you looking for the neon eggs". "yeah",answered yoshiru. "perhaps i can lend you a ride to jokes end". "how did you know",replied yoshiru. "a little fairy told me,and here she is" "hello,my name is natalie",said the fairy. "i know every thing about the gaurdians of the eggs",she said.
bah i finish this section later,i hafta draw some characters now
|
|
|
|
Post by Gene L.D. Ryoko on Nov 29, 2005 16:49:28 GMT -5
"oh really",said Yoshiru sarcasticly. "don't question the fairy man",said the guy. so Yoshiru,the guy,and natile rode to the western coast. "by the way,the names blargg,garry blargg,however every one calls me gargantan blargg",said the guy. Yoshiru then saw he had a red face,large sharpp teeth and angryish eyebrows. "So your from yoshi's island",questioned Yoshiru. "yep,and Natile is from the kokiri forest",Garry said. "It's getting colder",complained yoshiru. "thats becasue you are heading into a cold place",answered Natile. they rode through a cold area where ice based monsters attacked,Garry and yoshiru fought them while Natile gave advice. Thanks to garry's fire elemental magic,they were victorious. Eventually they made it to the frozen fortess. Yoshiru trekked in alone becasue it got to cold for Natlie and Garry didn't want to let her get killed,for then he would have knowledge about the land. "Garry said that the gardian of this place's friend,Jojora could help,but where is she," questioned yoshiru. Yoshiru had a tougher time betting the enemies but he learned two spells: fire and aero. Around the third floor he saw a floating girl fly past running away from some ice ahmirens,which he charred right away. "Hey,Jojora....." "what,and how do you know my name",she snaped. "A guy named Garry told me,yoshiru answered,"Anyways,do you know where the neon egg is"? "yes I do,but you won't get there with out my help",she answered. they fought through ice ahmiren,snow hounds,freeze dragons,swablu's,and Cackles before reaching the egg. To bad there was surprise waiting for them.
to be continued.....chaper 2,Frosty Fight
|
|
|
|
Post by Leoshi on Nov 29, 2005 17:32:21 GMT -5
Cool, I like this. I'll be sure to keep an eye on this one
|
|
|
|
Post by anjilfan on Nov 30, 2005 14:59:03 GMT -5
Hmmm......these stories are very interesting...
|
|
|
|
Post by Gene L.D. Ryoko on Nov 30, 2005 15:40:29 GMT -5
kudos to any one who can tell me how many cameo's I put for the enimes(give me names too)
|
|
|
|
Post by Gene L.D. Ryoko on Dec 31, 2005 10:37:33 GMT -5
err update.... another thing I've been reading another fanfict that was in a different form(gonna be used for this chapter),tell me if this one,or the last one was better
chapter 2: frosty fight
???Step back from MY egg you thieves!!
yoshiru: Thieves? and who said that.
???: ME,hyuk,hyuk,hyuk!! Ice Piranha!
Jojora: Wondering what happened to you,Now where are you!
Ice piranha: Above you! hyuk,hyuk,hyuk!
Ice piranha fell from the celling. To Yoshiru he looked like Naval piranha but he wasn't sure. Yet the fight began as Yoshiru pounded away with his hammer and Jojora used her wand to smack him.
Ice piranha: IS that all you pathetic fools have got! Eat this!
IP spit ice crystals at the two. Yoshiru smacked a crystal back with his hammer, but with a small weapon,Jojora missed and got hit.
Jojora: Darn it
yoshiru: Don't worry I got some shrooms from those monsters.
Yoshiru threw a shroom at Jojora who ate it and got back up.
Ice piranha: You guys are no fun. So let me end this NOW!
Giant ice spikes appeared from IP's little bulbs and he began to use them as swords. IP's accuracy and strength seemed to have increased because his first strike was inches a away from Yoshiru and went through the wall into the cold. Meanwhile.....
Garry: It sure has been awhile. You don't thi.....
Natalie: WAHHH!
IP's vine didn't go unnoticed as Natalie saw it,grabbed her friend,And flew both to the balcony outside and then went in. In the fight however,things were looking grim.
yoshiru: Man this guy is strong.
Jojora: So....tired.
Ice piranha: So,any last words! hyuk,hyuk,hyuk.
Garry: just one: Fira
At that moment there was a scream as a good sized fireball came speeding twords IP. As he burned there,he kept spitting ice and stabbing with his spikes.
Ice piranha: If I'm goin' down,YOUR COMING WITH ME!HYUK HYUK HYUK!
Only two attacks seem to hit, but hit well and busted jojora's wand. the other pinned Natalie to the wall.
Natalie: Oh crud!
There was then a puddle and withered plant where IP once was. Yoshiru then grabbed the egg and noticed It's light blue spots were glowing brighter then before. He shook it off as two voices came from the door.
???: How dare you get here before us....
???: ...and steal OUR egg!
yoshiru: Since when was it your egg!
???: Since Bowletta ordered us to get it...
???: ...and bring it to her.
Garry: Who are you two anyway.
Natalie: I believe their names are Kora and Kira.
Kora: how dare you speak our names...
Kira...you pathetic little freak!
???: Gah,this is entertaining but it's not finding the eggs,MOVE IT YOU WORM BITERS!
Yoshiru: Yeah,out of our way before I show you I pic I stole from a boo of birdo's and fawful's baby.
Jojora: Will you quit it with that pic,it's putting disturbing images in my head.
yoshiru: Nevah
Garry: when were those two that drunk.
yoshiru: in an another dimension.
while they were talking the sirens bolted out of the window twords the next destination.
Garry: anyway,Natalie and I did research and found the next egg is in mimics tower.
yoshiru: Well then lets go.
Jojora: I'm coming with so no one else has to see that picture.
everyone: joy[/sarcasm]
So the four jumped out of the hole IP made,into Garry's cart,and they set of twords mimic tower.
to be continued.....chapter 3: When is treasure chest not treasure chest,when it's a mimic.
credit: the boo and birdo and fawfuls baby are credited to pikachu150 of nintendo Nsider forums
|
|
|
|
Post by Yoshifighter on Dec 31, 2005 12:57:56 GMT -5
Hey I like that one its good.
|
|
