Post by Yoshi on Jun 19, 2007 16:43:01 GMT -5
The life experiences provided by a job at KFC are much more fulfilling than any amount of money could ever be.
Please, allow me to give you a mini-tour of our fine establishment before we start the shift.
The area you're standing in right now is the lobby. This is where our customers sit and eat when they decide they need our wholesome nutrients right away. Keeping food fresh keeps them coming back for more. Notice the deep groves in all of our booths, the chairs aren't very popular for our regulars. You can see one now, Mr. O'leary in his favorite spot, eating the same food by himself he does everyday. Follow his gaze and you can see him leering at the lobby attendant Carrie's fine buttox.
We think you'll get along with her. She's in love with our cashier, Jamal, the man waving at us now. Wave back, say hello. We're a team here, and a team that trusts each other is a team that's poised to get honors from the district manager. The door to the back has a combination lock, 1-5-2. Do not forget it. It hurts efficiency.
To the right you'll find our freezers and storage area. Right freezer coleslaw and desserts, left freezer is for chicken. Only the cook goes in there. Do not go in there, you will only get in the way. Take a sharp right to get to our back rooms. Feel free to put your personal belongings in any of these lockers as you choose, but you will have to bring your own lock - a few of our employees were known to steal the belongings of others. They had to be let go. Get familiar with the settings, you will be seeing them a lot. Cups, containers, sauces, everything that doesn't need to be frozen is all right here. I hope you can carry most of these by yourself; scrambling for help hurts efficiency.
Over here you'll see Dira taking biscuits out of the oven; right on time. As it should be. Be careful of what you say around her, she has a leniency towards gossip. Rumor is she also has a crush on Jamal, our ever-popular front desk cashier, so you'll hear a lot of crap about Carrie from her. Luckily she doesn't let it affect her performance. Otherwise she would have to be let go. She's coming this way - smile and wave. Good job.
You'll fit in just fine. Our ovens are arranged from left to right in very specific order, enforced by that shaking man in the office, Nick. Nick has had domestic issues and his wife and children left him only weeks ago. You'll usually find him crying in here; in fact Dira believes he's two steps away from bringing a shotgun and brutally murdering every person in this building. If he continues on this path then he'll have to be let go. You're not allowed to smoke on premises anywhere except the office. You are allowed to have one small cup of soda or water or soda-water, and when you're not drinking from it you must put it in the office. Label it, or someone else will drink it.
You know how to work registers, don't you? Well, figure it out through experience. It's the only way. The rest of the place is what I hope would be self-explanatory. The bathrooms are near the lobby. You'll have to be cleaning them at the end of your shift. Our usual person for the job had to be let go because he wasn't a team player.
Our chicken rack bisects the front desk half from the drive through half. You will either be working on one side or another, as dictated by a manager. Crossing the line to mingle is discouraged. It breaks the solidarity of your work team. If business is slow, find something nitpicky to take care of. It's okay to chit-chat sometimes, but the rule above all is to stay busy. You don't want to be found wanting - you want to be part of the group. It's more efficient that way.
Unless I've missed something I believe that concludes our little tour. It's been a pleasure, but now I must get back to real work - Spending too much time away from the food line is discouraged by the managers. The rest of your co-workers will arrive once the new shift really starts. You'll learn the details well enough through trial and error. Mostly error. Try not to make too many. It's going to be a long day, and it has only just begun.
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DeviantArt link. For terror.
Please, allow me to give you a mini-tour of our fine establishment before we start the shift.
The area you're standing in right now is the lobby. This is where our customers sit and eat when they decide they need our wholesome nutrients right away. Keeping food fresh keeps them coming back for more. Notice the deep groves in all of our booths, the chairs aren't very popular for our regulars. You can see one now, Mr. O'leary in his favorite spot, eating the same food by himself he does everyday. Follow his gaze and you can see him leering at the lobby attendant Carrie's fine buttox.
We think you'll get along with her. She's in love with our cashier, Jamal, the man waving at us now. Wave back, say hello. We're a team here, and a team that trusts each other is a team that's poised to get honors from the district manager. The door to the back has a combination lock, 1-5-2. Do not forget it. It hurts efficiency.
To the right you'll find our freezers and storage area. Right freezer coleslaw and desserts, left freezer is for chicken. Only the cook goes in there. Do not go in there, you will only get in the way. Take a sharp right to get to our back rooms. Feel free to put your personal belongings in any of these lockers as you choose, but you will have to bring your own lock - a few of our employees were known to steal the belongings of others. They had to be let go. Get familiar with the settings, you will be seeing them a lot. Cups, containers, sauces, everything that doesn't need to be frozen is all right here. I hope you can carry most of these by yourself; scrambling for help hurts efficiency.
Over here you'll see Dira taking biscuits out of the oven; right on time. As it should be. Be careful of what you say around her, she has a leniency towards gossip. Rumor is she also has a crush on Jamal, our ever-popular front desk cashier, so you'll hear a lot of crap about Carrie from her. Luckily she doesn't let it affect her performance. Otherwise she would have to be let go. She's coming this way - smile and wave. Good job.
You'll fit in just fine. Our ovens are arranged from left to right in very specific order, enforced by that shaking man in the office, Nick. Nick has had domestic issues and his wife and children left him only weeks ago. You'll usually find him crying in here; in fact Dira believes he's two steps away from bringing a shotgun and brutally murdering every person in this building. If he continues on this path then he'll have to be let go. You're not allowed to smoke on premises anywhere except the office. You are allowed to have one small cup of soda or water or soda-water, and when you're not drinking from it you must put it in the office. Label it, or someone else will drink it.
You know how to work registers, don't you? Well, figure it out through experience. It's the only way. The rest of the place is what I hope would be self-explanatory. The bathrooms are near the lobby. You'll have to be cleaning them at the end of your shift. Our usual person for the job had to be let go because he wasn't a team player.
Our chicken rack bisects the front desk half from the drive through half. You will either be working on one side or another, as dictated by a manager. Crossing the line to mingle is discouraged. It breaks the solidarity of your work team. If business is slow, find something nitpicky to take care of. It's okay to chit-chat sometimes, but the rule above all is to stay busy. You don't want to be found wanting - you want to be part of the group. It's more efficient that way.
Unless I've missed something I believe that concludes our little tour. It's been a pleasure, but now I must get back to real work - Spending too much time away from the food line is discouraged by the managers. The rest of your co-workers will arrive once the new shift really starts. You'll learn the details well enough through trial and error. Mostly error. Try not to make too many. It's going to be a long day, and it has only just begun.
=====
DeviantArt link. For terror.
