Post by UMS Author Lava on Oct 27, 2005 17:56:53 GMT -5
A very crazy story of Kingdom Hearts.
>>>Awakening
"I've been having these hallucinations lately...
Like...is any of this sane...or not?"
Sora sees himself on a big platform and sees a maiden with a blue-and-yellow dress and a small cape on.
"So much to do, so little time...Take your time. No need to rush the storyline. Now step forward. That is, if you're capable of doing so. Dink."
Sora steps forward. Huzzah.
"OK, this is gonna change your life forever. See the sword, staff, and shield? You pick one of those to power up Strength, Defense and HP, or AP and MP. Go on. If you're playing Expert, and you choose the sword, I can only say that you're screwed."
Sora, fortunately, is playing Normal. He picks the shield.
"I'm sorry, but to complete the whole programming, you need to give up something. C'mon, hurry it up!"
Sora decides that he might need magic, and he can easily power up fast, so he throws away the sword. Now the big platform shatters and he falls facefirst onto another one that has a princess in a white dress and glass slippers.
"Now hit the X button to swing that shield. *Sora does so* Woo-hoo. You can attack. Joy. Let's test it, OK?"
A few black thingies with silly antennae appear and try to hurt Sora, but Sora destroys one of them, and it bursts into little green balls. The other two run away.
"Goody. You killed off that creep. Since you're hurt, grab those balls. They restore your HP. and quit with the silent treatment. *black thingy appears behind Sora* Uh, Sora...*black thingy taps Sora's shoulder and sinks into shadows* Idiot. You missed it. Let's just move on."
Sora appears on a pink platform with a bunch of unascertainable junk on it.
"See that door? To make it opaque, you have to open that chest for nothing. *Sora does so* Goody. Now push the big crate. *mm-hmm* And bash that barrel and grab the Potion. OK, now you can go in there."
Sora enters and sees his annoying friends Tidus, Selphie, and Wakka.
"Go talk with those freaks. You'll have to if you wanna have a good level-up routine. But wait--this is a fan-fic! Does it matter, then?! Look, let's just skip this and go to the Aurora platform."
Yay, a bunch of black thingies for Sora to kill appear. *SPLAT!!!* And then a shiny circle appears.
"Step on that and save. SAVE YOUR GAME, FOOL!! *ridiculous laughter* OK, now go up to the Belle platform and face your first boss battle."
Sora runs up there and sees that his shadow his very long.
"Careful. Your shadow might turn into a big black monster thingy.
Whaddya know? It turned into a big black monster thingy. Just bash the hell outta that thingy."
After a long battle against Darkside, Sora's shield vanishes, and Darkside grabs him.
"Uh, this doesn't look pretty."
Darkside morphs into the scariest being in existence.
" Hoo boy. It turned into PAX-TV."
PAX-TV: You're watching "Good Heavens".
Old Lady in Heaven on TV: Jesus called today.
Old Man in Heaven on TV: *excited* He did?
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!"
"OMGOMGOMGOGLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!11111oneoneone"
>>To be continued...
>>>Awakening
"I've been having these hallucinations lately...
Like...is any of this sane...or not?"
Sora sees himself on a big platform and sees a maiden with a blue-and-yellow dress and a small cape on.
"So much to do, so little time...Take your time. No need to rush the storyline. Now step forward. That is, if you're capable of doing so. Dink."
Sora steps forward. Huzzah.
"OK, this is gonna change your life forever. See the sword, staff, and shield? You pick one of those to power up Strength, Defense and HP, or AP and MP. Go on. If you're playing Expert, and you choose the sword, I can only say that you're screwed."
Sora, fortunately, is playing Normal. He picks the shield.
"I'm sorry, but to complete the whole programming, you need to give up something. C'mon, hurry it up!"
Sora decides that he might need magic, and he can easily power up fast, so he throws away the sword. Now the big platform shatters and he falls facefirst onto another one that has a princess in a white dress and glass slippers.
"Now hit the X button to swing that shield. *Sora does so* Woo-hoo. You can attack. Joy. Let's test it, OK?"
A few black thingies with silly antennae appear and try to hurt Sora, but Sora destroys one of them, and it bursts into little green balls. The other two run away.
"Goody. You killed off that creep. Since you're hurt, grab those balls. They restore your HP. and quit with the silent treatment. *black thingy appears behind Sora* Uh, Sora...*black thingy taps Sora's shoulder and sinks into shadows* Idiot. You missed it. Let's just move on."
Sora appears on a pink platform with a bunch of unascertainable junk on it.
"See that door? To make it opaque, you have to open that chest for nothing. *Sora does so* Goody. Now push the big crate. *mm-hmm* And bash that barrel and grab the Potion. OK, now you can go in there."
Sora enters and sees his annoying friends Tidus, Selphie, and Wakka.
"Go talk with those freaks. You'll have to if you wanna have a good level-up routine. But wait--this is a fan-fic! Does it matter, then?! Look, let's just skip this and go to the Aurora platform."
Yay, a bunch of black thingies for Sora to kill appear. *SPLAT!!!* And then a shiny circle appears.
"Step on that and save. SAVE YOUR GAME, FOOL!! *ridiculous laughter* OK, now go up to the Belle platform and face your first boss battle."
Sora runs up there and sees that his shadow his very long.
"Careful. Your shadow might turn into a big black monster thingy.
Whaddya know? It turned into a big black monster thingy. Just bash the hell outta that thingy."After a long battle against Darkside, Sora's shield vanishes, and Darkside grabs him.
"Uh, this doesn't look pretty."
Darkside morphs into the scariest being in existence.
"
Hoo boy. It turned into PAX-TV."PAX-TV: You're watching "Good Heavens".
Old Lady in Heaven on TV: Jesus called today.
Old Man in Heaven on TV: *excited* He did?
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!"
"OMGOMGOMGOGLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!11111oneoneone"
>>To be continued...