PWN|Yoshi
Junior Yoshi
I choose not to make people laugh... :3
Posts: 139
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Post by PWN|Yoshi on Jun 6, 2009 11:05:18 GMT -5
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Post by Sanjo on Jun 11, 2009 12:04:13 GMT -5
Hmm... well, that was.... interesting, to say the least.
A few tips on my end. Whenever you're reading a comic, it's usually very easy to tell who is saying what first. If you ever read comics in the newspaper or even manga (with Japan's whole reading from right to left thing), they can be pretty easy to direct yourself through the dialogue. I'm assuming you want us to read this left to right, yes? So for example, in panels 2-4, a good way of avoiding confusion would be to have the dialogue that's supposed to be read first on top of the other dialogues, so it's like we're reading it from top to bottom. Also, make sure the font is a little easier to read. I could read it up to the black font.
One other thing is that I get the whole "Tails Doll" thing, so I guess that part wasn't as bad, but the whole comic in general seems to be completely random, and it probably would be funnier if there was a point to it, ya know?
It's a valiant effort, but could still use some work.
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